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VitaminQ - a temple of trivia lists and curious words
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~ Saturday, August 31, 2002
TWENTY THREE SKIDOO The unusual phrase 'twenty three skidoo' (meaning, broadly, no chance, or get lost) became 'perhaps the first truly national fad expression' in the USA at the beginning of the 1900s. Its origin (as with that of 'OK') has been much discussed by word-lovers. Here are some possibilities for its derivation: 1 It comes from a play version of 'A Tale of Two Cities' where a character counts the prisoners heading for the guillotine. The hero Carton was number 23, and her weepy cry of this number became a Broadway catchphrase. Skidoo (or skiddoo) was added 'for the enlightenment of anyone who hadn't seen the play'. 2 The word and the number were both displayed on pennants and armbands at shore resorts (for unexplained reasons) around 1900 and the two got added together to form the nonsense phrase. 3 'Twenty three' as a euphemism for 'get lost' originates in a play called Little Johnny Jones by George M Cohan where the phrase is used by an old time trouper from 'Frisco'. 4 It is a version of SKYDDU, a word painted on walls as a rain omen (a pun on 'sky dew'). 5 It was once part of a telegraphic code where numbers stood for common phrases; 23 was the code for 'away with you!'. source: Catch Phrases by Eric Partridge (1977) A reader (thanks Ken) reminds me that another suggestion has to do with the Flatiron building in NYC, a wedge shaped block which stands on 23rd Street. It is said that strange wind currents roused by the building's shape would cause ladies' skirts to be blown up. Hence policemen shooing voyeurs with the "23 skidoo!" THE NEW ROCK AND ROLL In the early 1990s, the broadcaster Janet Street Porter described comedy as 'the new rock and roll', thereby ushering in a popular buzz phrase of the last decade. Whether she coined it is unknown. Here are various things which have been tarred with the epithet The New Rock and Roll. Most common by far is number 9. 1 anger 2 greyhound racing 3 domestic appliances 4 brown 5 mathematics 6 weblogging 7 corporate gigs 8 sports 9 gardening 10 history 11 art 12 cookery 13 bingo 14 satire 15 being a father 16 chess 17 coffee 18 film making 19 football 20 public speaking 21 poetry 22 fishing 23 comics 24 medicine 25 gaming 26 DIY 27 living space design 28 entrepreneurs 29 languages 30 hypnosis 31 retro 32 debt restructuring 33 outsiders 34 sexual fetishism 35 coughing 36 sci-fi 37 ballet 38 e-business 39 Cardiff 40 toilet humour 41 cabaret 42 Java 43 preaching 44 gas contracts 45 modelling 46 image 47 English porn 48 cushions 49 farming 50 education 51 lawn mower racing 52 niche marketing 53 animation 54 dying 55 food 56 soaps 57 custard pie fighting 58 enterprise portals 59 life after death 60 housewares 61 the Net 62 philosophy 63 hard boiled fiction 64 genomics 65 fashion 66 flamenco 67 nautical facial hair 68 anti-globalisation 69 Pokémon 70 newspaper columns 71 porridge 72 theatre 73 technology 74 geology 75 jellied eels 76 birth control 77 care of the elderly 78 online radio 79 banjos 80 day trading 81 graphics cards 82 self storage 83 climbing 84 tropical fish source: the WWW; DIVINE INVENTION 28 things invented by clergymen 1 the barocyclonometer 2 written form of the Inuktitut language 3 the reaping machine 4 the pill lock for rifles 5 the rickshaw 6 bourbon 7 Oor Wullie 8 the pantograph 9 the knitting machine 10 Bayesian algorithms 11 the rain gauge 12 the Stirling engine 13 the watch 14 the corkscrew 15 the slide rule 16 the tobacco boat 17 germ theory of diseases 18 the gutta percha golf ball 19 Father John's lung and throat tonic 20 the Gamble Radiated Telegraph 21 the induction coil 22 the Oliver Standard Visible Writer 23 the Eclipse windmill 24 the pyramidon organ stop 25 the stocking frame 26 Tweedledum and Tweedledee 27 the pedal radio 28 Y-fronts* *any proof of this one? - We had to leave it out of the book, but I KNOW it's true. MICHTY ME! 12 Scots words found in the poetry of W.N. Herbert and what they mean 1 slattyvarryish - tasting like edible seaweed 2 tinkle-sweetie - bell rung around 8pm, when shops were closed 3 smoorikins - stolen kisses 4 cappilow - to outdo another in reaping 5 crappit heids - stuffed heads of haddock 6 mirligoes - specks that dance before the eyes 7 dingle-dousie - a lighted stick waved rapidly in the dark to form an arc of light 8 sheemach - a matted mass of hair 9 glawnicies - optical illusions caused by witchcraft 10 growkin sowff - a longing sigh 11 mumbudjit - utterly hushed 12 crambo-clink - poetic doggerel IF MARVIN HAD LIVED How Mr Gaye might have altered his repertoire for the older generation: I Heard It Through The Grapevine... Mrs Jones had a hysterectomy. What's Going On... all those beeping noises on the bus. (Sexual) Healing... when are they going to sort my prostate out? Let's Get It On... World Championship Bowls on BBC2 Mercy Mercy Me... the price of peppermints these days! Wherever I Lay My Hat... I always forget where I put it. Source: by RcL VINTAGE CARVING A list of Elizabethan verbs proper to the serving and carving of meats. Lift that Swan Rear that Goose Dismember that Hern Unbrace that Mallard Unlace that Coney Allay that Pheasant Wing that Partridge Display that Quail Unjoynt that Bittern Unlatch that Curlew Break that Egript Thigh that Woodcock from The Accomplisht Cook by Robert May; reprinted in A Word in Your Ear by Ivor Brown (1942) WHEN HARE GOT SILLY A list of alternatives to the Hare Krishna chant 'Call out Gouranga, be happy!' Call out gooseberry, be pippy! Call out goulash, be nippy! Call out Good Hope, be capey! Call out gourmet, be crepey! Call out Guggenheim, be preppy! Call out Gutenberg, be typey! Call out goosander, be flappy! Call out goodnight, be sleepy! Call out Goonhilly, be slopey! Call out googly, be dippy! Call out Goolagong, be Skippy! Call out goosebumps, be creepy! Call out Goombay, be weepy! Call out guru, be hippy! Call out Goodyear, be non-slippy! Call out goujon, be strippy! Call out gouache, be drippy! Call out goo-goo, be nappy! Call out Goodwood, be snappy! Call out goudale, be soupy! Call out Goodge Street, be shoppy! Call out Gudmundsdottir, be stroppy! Call out Goodman, be boppy! Call out goober nut, be croppy! Call out gourami, be guppy! Call out ghoul, be duppy! Call out Goofy, be puppy! Call out Good Vibrations, be poppy! Call out Goon Show, be loopy! Call out Gujarat, be rupee! by RcL WHAT SHE SELLS Some excellent seashell names: glory-of-the-seas bursa frog orange-mouth olive lima file babylon turrid elephant's snout volute frilled dogwinkle australian trumpet florida horse conch triton's trumpet bull-mouth helmet sunburst carrier tapestry turban bear paw lightning whelk partridge tun donkey ear abalone wedding cake venus bleeding tooth giant knobbed cerith coat-of-mail precious wentle-trap commercial top turkey wing ark geography cone sunrise tellin onyx slipper great keyhole limpet papery rapa spiny vase ostrich foot tankerville's ancilla roostertail colourful atlantic moon paper bubble miraculous thatcheria AURAL AMBROSIA A list of 40 of my favourite albums (updated summer 04): Tori Amos - Boys for Pele Virginia Astley - Hope in a Darkened Heart Aztec Camera - High Land Hard Rain Bark Psychosis - Hex The Beloved - Happiness Big Star - Radio City Blue Aeroplanes - Swagger The Blue Nile - A Walk Across the Rooftops Burach - Deeper Kate Bush - Hounds of Love The Clash - London Calling Cockney Rebel - The Human Menagerie Leonard Cohen - Songs of The Delgados - The Great Eastern Dexy's Midnight Runners - Too Rye Ay The Durutti Column - Another Setting Eyeless in Gaza - Rust Red September Donald Fagen - The Nightfly Fatima Mansions - Viva Dead Ponies! Nanci Griffith - One Fair Summer Evening Robin Holcomb - Robin Holcomb Labradford - Mi Media Naranja Jackie Leven - Forbidden Songs of the Dying West Wim Mertens - Usura Microdisney - The Clock Comes Down the Stairs Mogwai - Rock Action Mojave 3 - Out of Tune Nico - Chelsea Girl Stina Nordenstam - And She Closed Her Eyes Micheal Nyman - Drowning By Numbers Old Blind Dogs - The World's Room Orange Juice - You Can't Hide Your Love Forever Rachel's - Music for Egon Schiele REM - Murmur Kate Rusby - Little Lights Shelleyan Orphan - Century Flower 10000 Maniacs - The Wishing Chair Ultravox - Ultravox! Velocette - Fourfold Remedy Young Marble Giants - Colossal Youth HOW TO SING THE BLUES This is one of those round robin email lists, most of which are dire, but I really like this one: 1 Most Blues begin, "Woke up this morning." 2 " I got a good woman (or man)" is a bad way to begin the Blues, 'less you stick something nasty in the next line, like "I got a good man, with the meanest face in town." 3 The Blues is simple. After you get the first line right, repeat it. Then find something that rhymes ... sort of: "Got a good woman - with the meanest face in town. Got teeth like Margaret Thatcher - and she weigh 500 pound." 4 The Blues are not about choice. You stuck in a ditch, you stuck in a ditch; ain't no way out. 5 Blues cars: Chevys and Cadillacs and broken-down trucks. Blues don't travel in Volvos, BMWs, or Sport Utility Vehicles. Most Blues transportation is a Greyhound bus or a southbound train. Jet aircraft an' state-sponsored motor pools ain't even in the running. Walkin' plays a major part in the blues lifestyle. So does fixin' to die. 6 Teenagers can't sing the Blues. They ain't fixin' to die yet. Adults sing the Blues. In Blues, "adulthood" means being old enough to get the electric chair if you shoot a man in Memphis. 7 Blues can take place in New York City but not in Hawaii or any place in Canada. Hard times in St. Paul or Tucson is just depression. Chicago, St.Louis, and Kansas City still the best places to have the Blues. You cannot have the blues in any place that don't get rain. 8 A man with male pattern baldness ain't the blues. A woman with male pattern baldness is. Breaking your leg cuz you skiing is not the blues. Breaking your leg cuz an alligator be chomping on it is. 9 You can't have no Blues in an office or a shopping mall. The lighting is wrong. Go outside to the parking lot and sit by the dumpster. 10 Good places for the Blues: a highway b jailhouse c empty bed d bottom of a whiskey glass Bad places: a Ashrams b gallery openings c Ivy League institutions d golf courses 11 No one will believe it's the Blues if you wear a suit, 'less you happen to be an old ethnic person, and you slept in it. 12 Do you have the right to sing the Blues? Yes, if: a you're older than dirt b you're blind c you shot a man in Memphis d you can't be satisfied No, if: a you have all your teeth b you were once blind but now can see c the man in Memphis lived. d you have a retirement plan or trust fund. 13 Blues is not a matter of color. It's a matter of bad luck. Tiger Woods cannot sing the blues. Gary Coleman could. Ugly white people also got a leg up on the blues. 14 If you ask for water and Baby give you gasoline, it's the Blues. Other acceptable Blues beverages are: a wine b whiskey or bourbon c muddy water d black coffee The following are NOT Blues beverages: a mixed drinks b kosher wine c Snapple d sparkling water 15 If it occurs in a cheap motel or a shotgun shack, it's a Blues death. Stabbed in the back by a jealous lover is another Blues way to die. So is the electric chair, substance abuse, and dying lonely on a broken down cot. You can't have a Blues death if you die during a tennis match or while getting liposuction. 16 Some Blues names for women: a Sadie b Big Mama c Bessie d Fat River Dumpling 17. Some Blues names for men: a Joe b Willie c Little Willie d Big Willie 18 Persons with names like Sierra, Sequoia, Auburn, and Rainbow can't sing the Blues no matter how many men they shoot in Memphis. 19 Make your own Blues name (starter kit): a name of physical infirmity (Blind, Cripple, Lame, etc.) b first name (see above) plus name of fruit (Lemon, Lime, Kiwi,etc.) c last name of President (Jefferson, Johnson, Fillmore, etc.) For example, Blind Lime Jefferson, or Cripple Kiwi Fillmore, etc. (Well, maybe not "Kiwi.") 20 I don't care how tragic your life is: you own a computer, you cannot sing the blues. ~ Friday, August 30, 2002
TWO THINGS WHICH LASTED EIGHT MINUTES 1 The battle of Culloden 2 The wedding ceremony of Elvis and Priscilla Presley GEORGE POLTI'S 36 DRAMATIC SITUATIONS These apparently cover all possible storylines: 1 Supplication 2 Deliverance 3 Crime pursued by vengeance 4 Vengeance taken for kindred upon kindred 5 Pursuit 6 Disaster 7 Falling prey to cruelty or misfortune 8 Revolt 9 Daring enterprise 10 Abduction 11 The Enigma 12 Obtaining 13 Enmity of kinsmen 14 Rivalry of kinsmen 15 Murderous adultery 16 Madness 17 Fatal imprudence 18 Involuntary crimes of love 19 Slaying of kinsman unrecognised 20 Self-sacrifice for an ideal 21 Self-sacrifice for kindred 22 All sacrificed for passion 23 Necessity of sacrificing loved ones 24 Rivalry of superior and inferior 25 Adultery 26 Crimes of love 27 Discovery of the dishonour of a loved one 28 Obstacles to love 29 An enemy loved 30 Ambition 31 Conflict with a god 32 Mistaken jealousy 33 Erroneous judgment 34 Remorse 35 Recovery of a lost one 36 Loss of loved ones The 'odd word' number ones 1 Do the Bartman 2 The Mighty Quinn 3 Perfect Day 4 Don't Look Back in Anger 5 All Shook Up 6 Ernie 7 No Scrubs 8 C'est La Vie 9 Geno 10 Super Trouper 11 American Pie 12 Down Under 1960s odd words: 1 Eleanor Rigby 2 Puppet on a String 3 Rock-a-Hula Baby 4 Two Little Boys 5 The Isrealites 6 Little Children 7 A Whiter Shade of Pale 8 Lily the Pink 9 Little Red Rooster 10 Where Do You Go To, My Lovely? 11 The Ballad of John and Yoko 12 Those Were the Days 1970s: 1 Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick 2 Matchstick men and Matchstick Cats and Dogs 3 Fernando 4 All Kinds of Everything 5 Up Town Top Ranking 6 Woodstock 7 Wand'rin Star 8 Grandad 9 Telegram Sam 10 Tears of a Clown 11 I Don't Like Mondays 12 Rubber Bullets 1980s: 1 Going Underground 2 Orinoco Flow 3 The Reflex 4 Belfast Child 5 House of Fun 6 La Bamba 7 Star Trekkin 8 De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da 9 Two Tribes 10 Too Much Too Young | |